The magazine Evangelicals
Now has been making some noise on the net with an interview with a minister,
Vaughan Roberts, discussing his “struggle with same sex attraction”. The
article has been mentioned on the Gospel Coalition site, a major U.S. evangelical
and reformed theology site and by several Christian bloggers.
The article has also been blogged about by Andrew Brown of the Guardian. I found his post to be pretty poor in its insistence on
re-labelling Vaughan Roberts as gay. I don’t object to re-labelling someone
entirely – I’d re-label the Pope sexist and John Howard racist against their
own identifications. But I don’t think it’s justified here. Vaughan Roberts
gives reasons for not calling himself gay and I can respect them without
agreeing with them. I don’t need to re-label him.
I disagree with Vaughan Roberts that gay sex is wrong. I
think about right or wrong in such a spectacularly different way to Vaughan
Roberts that saying gay sex is wrong is a little nonsensical to me. I have to
consider the harms of any action to condemn it. I also consider matters of
consent and rights and intent but harms are crucial. When looking at harms I
don’t take broad statistics and say whether or not generally speaking something
is harmful either. I try and be as specific as possible. Take driving a car for
example. Is that wrong or right? Surely that depends on why and how you are
driving a car. It would require me to adopt a supreme moral simplicity to ever
be able to say that all gay sex is
wrong… or right for that matter. It actually feels a lot easier to say that all
car driving is wrong. (Except ambulances and fire engines … see what I mean)
In this regard I am not different to even those Christians
who think homosexuality is wrong. If you asked many of those Christians if it
was wrong to kill somebody almost all would answer that it depends. Many U.S.
Christians took the same position about torturing people in Abu Ghraib; it
depends. That’s something I find much harder to swallow. Certainly if you asked
them if it was ok to drive a car they, like me, would recognize harms and
benefits and ask for more information before making any call. A simple yes or
no in these areas is generally considered as too simple by all of us.
In the matter of homosexuality, however, Vaughan Roberts and
the Gospel Coalition take a dim view of any practice of it at all. I imagine
that they might possibly consider homosexual rape worse than a homosexual date
but even the latter is never “good”. They are able to give a simple no answer
to all gay sex.
This moral position is hurtful to those who are trying to
live good gay lives, who have made sacrifices for their partners, and whose
loving relationships may feel like one of the best things they have done with
their life. This moral position is saying all of that good feeling is misplaced
and that in fact the moral heart of the universe (God) is deeply opposed to all
that effort.
Vaughan Roberts specifically describes same-sex attraction
as a temptation. He calls acting on that attraction sin. However before we
respond to Vaughan
from a position of hurt we should listen to what he doesn’t say to justify his attitude to homosexuality. In that
silence I found reason to question exactly how I disagreed with him and whether any hurt made sense.
Vaughan
doesn’t say anywhere that desires for a homosexual relationship reflect
different priorities than desires for a heterosexual one. The very real
possibility exists after this interview that gay desire is understood as just like
heterosexual desire in its motivations. That’s huge. And by huge I mean massively,
humongously gigantic.
Consider the difference between recognizing that:
a) gay
and straight relationships are both sought by people equally looking for
someone to share their life with, to feel passion with, to make sacrifices for
and to hold them while they cry over Amy and Rory’s story in Dr. Who and;
b) Straight
people are looking for the above but gay people are instead motivated by a
desire to get back at daddy, spit in the eye of God, get one’s rocks off in any
way possible and so on.
There is a long history of pathologising homosexual desire.
This has been a cruelty to gay and lesbian people in and outside the church.
Take the time to feel your desire to hug and hold your love. Imagine it being translated
for you by counselors and ministers into hatred of a parent or of God or of
your self. Imagine being taught to think in that language. The part of you that
wants to creep a hand forward to touch the back of someone else’s, that does so
timidly and lovingly, is supposed to be thought of as rebellious, God-hating,
gladly perverse and mean. Challenging that language has been the preeminent
struggle against church and psychology of the gay movements’ history. But Vaughan
Roberts seems not to be found on the other side of that struggle.
The other thing that Vaughan does not say is that people’s lives are more terrible when they act out homosexuality than when they do not. That again is stupendously enormous. Indeed Vaughan recognizes celibacy as hard (and the way of the cross) while open gay relationships are attractive (though he attributes that to the devil). Vaughan does state that the benefits of remaining faithful to the bible have been promised in this life as well as the afterlife; however he specifically relates that to the loss of family (as in not getting married and having children in this case) and to persecutions. Vaughan doesn’t make a case for his choice of celibacy over homosexuality being reflected in emotional, material or health benefits intrinsic to those choices.
The other thing that Vaughan does not say is that people’s lives are more terrible when they act out homosexuality than when they do not. That again is stupendously enormous. Indeed Vaughan recognizes celibacy as hard (and the way of the cross) while open gay relationships are attractive (though he attributes that to the devil). Vaughan does state that the benefits of remaining faithful to the bible have been promised in this life as well as the afterlife; however he specifically relates that to the loss of family (as in not getting married and having children in this case) and to persecutions. Vaughan doesn’t make a case for his choice of celibacy over homosexuality being reflected in emotional, material or health benefits intrinsic to those choices.
Consider again the differences between;
a) If
you experience same sex attraction you may obtain happiness if you pursue
loving relationships with someone of the same gender or;
b) No
matter what the propaganda of the gay community, people who actively engage in
sexual behaviour outside of married heterosexual relationships have short,
unhappy and tragic lives.
Recently the head of the
Australian Christian Lobby (an organization that is an embarrassment to many
Christians) described homosexuality as more dangerous than smoking. Peter
Jensen, Archbishop of the Sydney Anglicans shortly afterwards refused to
distance himself from the comments on Australian television. “Catholic Answers” a website and magazine
composed of Roman Catholic apologists makes similar claims that “homosexual behaviour kills homosexuals”. Opponents of homosexuality have tried to fold
their morality into a concern for people’s health for as long as they have been
prevented from just calling gay people witches. They tend to abuse general
statistics on gay health indicators to support their case.
The gay movement has successfully
improved this conversation about health by showing that a myriad of factors are
involved. Evelyn Hooker, as long
ago as 1957, proved that if gay people have communities to belong to with a positive
self-image then there are no differences between straight and gay mental health. Increasingly the positive lives of gay
people who are not reeling from family exclusion and social condemnation have
been able to be public examples to younger gay people. Gay advocates have exposed
the hypocrisy of shaming and isolating organizations like the Catholic church
claiming to teach what is best for gay health. There are real parallels between
this struggle and the struggle of indigenous people in Australia to challenge
the language of their oppressors in calling them “a doomed race”. However
Vaughan Roberts just isn’t on the other side of this struggle either.
Vaughan Roberts seems to answer both
the question of the motivation of homosexuality and of the harms with what I
listed as option a. (see both a) and b) points above). However the b) points are what
I assume to be implied by those Christians who say that homosexuality is wrong.
That’s because of the people in the name of Christianity who make those specific
claims and it’s because it’s hard for
me to see how you could agree with position a) in both questions and yet still
say that gayness is wrong. I could only say that gay sex is always wrong if I believed
that;
- homosexual and heterosexual desire for relationship are not basically the same aspiration
- and a gay life is consistently observably harming.
Grossly simplifying the whole
discussion, people advocating for the celebration of same sex relationships
want to move people from position b) to position a) in regard to the above two
questions. That is really the entirety of the debate for someone like myself.
In Vaughan’s
piece it very much seems to me that he is already there or at least is able to
be there without contradicting anything he says in his interview. My arguments and
indeed those of any gay movements whose history I know are exhausted once Vaughan gets to option a)
in both questions. How then can he and I still disagree?
Vaughan gives one reason and one reason only,
for saying that he shouldn’t act on his same-sex attraction. He believes that
it is the opinion of his scriptures. I do disagree with him on this. I disagree
both that his scriptures are all that clear on the issue of homosexuality and
that his scriptures reflect anything more than opinions on moral matters. I
don’t believe they are authoritative in the way he uses them. But seriously what
am I going to have to do to win those arguments? His opinion that these texts
are authoritative and inerrant (and mean what he thinks) is really beyond my
hope of changing with argument. As I pointed out in an earlier blog post, it can be
possible for a person to have a magic book that simply can never be properly
tested. I remain pessimistic about that kind of discussion.
What really interests me is the question of if that is his
only argument, does it matter? If both he and I agree that homosexual and
heterosexual attraction should be viewed as similar motivations and that a
person might find (and bring to others) happiness in a same-sex relationship
then can we oddly agree to disagree on the actual morality of homosexual
behaviour? Vaughan
really seems to be saying that the only reason homosexuality is wrong is the
attitude of his God. That puts a gay lover at risk of metaphysical harms – i.e.
Gods punishment, however I don’t believe in either that God or his punishment. It
follows then that Vaughan
hasn’t said anything with meaning for me. Can I therefore feel hurt by that? Should
I simply say that that is his religion and I have mine?
I’m not sure about any conclusion to this. I am not
interested in either sowing dissension or even striving for consensus for no good
reason. Vaughan
sounds just as concerned as I am about the lack of love shown people who
experience same sex attraction. Maybe we should just agree to disagree. I
really like his views on whether sexual orientation can change as well. But so
much still seems unresolved. If a happy and healthily motivated gay
relationship can still be called sin that’s not where I’d hoped we’d end up. I
thought being able to convince people that gay lives weren’t sick and suffering
ones would mean they would also say gay is ok. It may not though, because of some
people’s allegiance to the words in their magic book. I really don’t know where a conversation could
go from here.
Note:
I realize I have made “an argument from silence”, that is I
have made an act of speech out of what Vaughan
hasn’t said. This ignores that he might say it elsewhere (such as in his book
which I haven’t read). Or that his silence may mean something else than how I’ve
interpreted it. If you think that’s the case based on knowing him better please
comment. I do think it’s a pretty loud silence on his behalf given the history
and context I’ve outlined.